trauma recovery

The Key to Finding Strength When You Feel Weak

| Rachel Boulos

When it comes to the hustle and power moves of my peers, I just can’t compete. While they’re off growing careers, raising families, volunteering, and serving on the mission field, I’m just hoping to string coherent words together and walk around the block.

As much as I fight to stay strong, the truth is I’m sick. My mental real estate is spent managing pain, energy levels, brain fog, and the symptoms of post-traumatic stress. So when my reality doesn’t reflect my calling to be part of God’s mission on earth, I feel bad. Guilty. Unsuccessful. Like I’m letting God down.

These days, when God invites me to partner with Him, I politely decline because I know someone else can do it better. Play it safe and stay within your limits, I tell myself. To avoid the sting of failure and embarrassment, I take my seat on the bench or just quietly see myself out.

My growing list of fears and failures over the years rendered me last picked for the team.

Or so I thought. Continue reading →

5 Ways to Hijack Your Stress Response

| Rachel Boulos

When you face one crisis after the next, life can become a series of acute emergencies. After two surgeries this Fall, my season in life has been a bit…stressful. Come to think of it, this season has been on repeat a lot lately.

As in the past three years.

When it feels like the world is descending into a tailspin, you don’t have to. Stress can be optional.

Sound crazy? I thought so too. But the more I learn about the way God has wired me to survive, the better I understand the tools He’s given me to relieve the pressure when my body revs up. Continue reading →

5 Effective Ways to Deal with Difficult People Right Now

Dealing with difficult people
| Rachel Boulos

The increased conflict of recent years has put many of us on edge. I’ve seen friendships implode over hurtful words and differing opinions. I’ve watched marriages bend under the weight of mental health challenges and family drama.

When you’re in survival mode, dealing with difficult people can feel like the tipping point. The popular idea of “cutting people out” of your life is tempting when you’re just trying to make it through the week.

Before you throw in the towel, here are 5 things to keep in mind when relating to difficult people. Continue reading →

10 Things Not to Say to Those Who are Hurting and Distressed

two mugs in a living room
| Rachel Boulos

The world is hurting. Again.

If we’re honest, we’re all having a difficult time with something right now. And after everything we’ve experienced in the last two years, how could we not?

Maybe your heart is broken by what you see on the news. Or you’re feeling the financial pressure with rising prices here at home. You may be worried about your job, your family, your health. Anxiety and depression could be taking a toll. Or loneliness is growing because your friendships don’t look the same anymore.

It’s likely we’re all a bit more overwhelmed and overloaded than before.

Yet in spite of all we’re enduring, I’ve heard people say these things as of late… Continue reading →

Trusting Jesus in the Storm: Part 2

| Rachel Boulos

He peered over the rim at the churning waves below. Gripping the side of the boat, Peter steadied himself as it fiercely rocked to and fro.

Violent winds had stirred the waters into a foaming frenzy. Despite their rowing efforts, the disciples had made little headway. Six hours of unrelenting stress, exhaustion and willpower had produced only a few miles at best. Their finite strength had paled in comparison to the unpredictable power of nature.

Thunder rippled across the sea and echoed off the mountains in the distance. Peter wiped the salty water from his eyes as he squinted to see the man on the waves. Exhaustion and excitement quickened his heart as he mulled over what he had just heard above the raging wind.

“Come.” Continue reading →

Seeing Jesus in the Storm: Part 1

| Rachel Boulos

From the very beginning, things did not go as planned. What had started out as a normal day quickly spiraled into a nightmare. Cloaked in darkness and gripped by fear, the promise of death seemed imminent.

The disciples were seamen. This was their lake. As professionals, they were used to navigating the changing waters and unforeseen circumstances.

But this storm was different. 

Violent winds had stirred the waves into a foaming frenzy. Despite their best rowing efforts, they had made little headway. Six hours of unrelenting stress, exhaustion and willpower had produced only a few miles at best. Continue reading →

How to Survive the Holidays After Losing Someone You Love

| Rachel Boulos

I still remember all the firsts. The first vacation. First birthday. Our first Christmas without Dad. That feeling of trying to celebrate the holidays while a piece of our heart and home was missing.

Holidays are naturally a big deal and loss can feel even deeper during those times that magnify our togetherness.

This year, over 300,000 families will wake up Christmas morning without their loved one. Our family will once again experience another first Christmas without someone one we love. This year, the celebration may feel a little less merry and bright.

Grief can be challenging and confusing. Sometimes it feels like you’re drowning, other times like you’re being hollowed out from the inside. Overstimulated, yet numb at the same time. The stages of grief can feel cyclical and repetitive, causing you to wonder if life will ever feel normal again.

Continue reading →